Northern Vietnam—

After Chiang Mai, I had a flight to Hanoi. Arriving in at the airport, I had a bit of a nightmare, despite doing some preparation, such as applying for a visa before arrival. First issue - the visa desk would not accept a screenshot on my phone of the visa acceptance email they sent me. All they said was “Need printed”. I look around and in this spartan customs area, there is clearly no printer. But they still continue to refuse and repeat “Need printed”. I sat down to figure out what to do, and I see some officials talking to foreigners who appeared to be in the same boat. I observe and figure out that they are my ticket out as they manage to skirt this requirement, as the expense of some extra US dollars. One amateur tourist opened their wallet out to the official, who took all the money inside. Unfortunately, this corrupt practice is my only way out, so I play along, giving them the minimal amount of money by first asking what the price was (USD 20), and transfering only USD 10 into my wallet from cash stash, which they accepted.

Second issue - I pre-arranged a pickup with local shuttle company, which in retrospect, wasn’t the best idea. I did it because it was cheaper than the hotel company’s offer, and I didn’t want to pay roaming charges to hire a Grab Taxi (Uber equivalent) via the internet, nor bother with getting a SIM card at the airport. Our driver was going to be waiting on foot in the pickup area with my name written. I found him and he signaled to me that he was going to pick up the car from parking and come back to pick me and my two pieces of massive luggage. After about 10 minutes, I think I see him, wave, and then a small hatchback pulls into the loading bay. I load up my stuff, and off we drive.

As we drive out of the pickup zone, and exit out of the airport gates onto the highway, the driver notices his phone go off. The driver now seems a little distressed. He says he needs to return to the pickup zone, which is a pain in the ass as because we are already on the highway. I notice the familar Grab Taxi driver display on his phone. Shit. This isn’t actually the same guy that was holding the sign with my name. While they had the same build and both had a t-shirt on, the sign guy was covered in arm tattoos, this guy is an empty canvas. Now I’m nervous that my guy has left, as he wouldn’t be able to contact my UK number. 5 minutes later, we are back, and very luckily, I find my sign guy and there are no more issues for the journey to the hotel.

My trip to Hanoi at this particular time was planned well ahead of time. I wanted to do a guided mixed on-road and off-road motorcycle tour and settled on this particular tour because it fit within my timelines. There was an planned tour with 5 other Kiwis so I was allowed to tag along, which was nice of them as they wouldn’t have known my motorcycle skills at this stage.

I stayed at the Mai Charming Hotel & Spa, a budget hotel that was nearby the hotel of the others on the tour. I had one free day in Hanoi before we left on the trip. I enjoyed the smorgasbord of available foods at the tiny restaurants scattered around, while doing admin like getting a SIM card and getting some missing pieces of motorcycle protection such as an armoured jacket and some bad ass looking black jeans with knee armour.

At 8am October 6, I was picked up in a large van, which had already picked up the other tour members and their gear, I was the last to get picked up. We are dropped of at a motorcycle depot where all tours start for this particular provider. I meet the fellows I will be with for the rest of the trip. Kim, our 29 year old tour guide, a local who has been giving these kind of tours for the past few years. Tu, our mechanic, who could speak very little english but was a hoot to hang out with and did alot of the hard work that we took for granted, such as the early morning maintenance. As for the tour participants, there was a group of 4 friends from New Zealand. Russ and Brian, lads in their 50s who shared a love of motorcycling and had met back in high school. Russ took his younger 40s friend, Hamish, which I don’t recall how their relationship formed. Brian took Tim, another youngin in his early 40s who was a fellow lawyer that worked in the office next to Brian’s law firm. There was a late addition to the group, Josh, an IT sales manager in his late 30s who was inbetween jobs in Sydney and wanted a quick getaway. And there was me, late 20s, and in stark contrast, had only 1 days on-road experience to their combined 100 years of on-road experience.

Geared up and briefings done, we set out on the tour.

We spend our first night at a homestay in a non-descript village. An incredibly fun first night, getting to know my tour group over a few drinks.

Due to circumstances outside our control, such as my puncture and the unexpected slow boat transfer of the boats, night had fallen and we were still about an hour from our 2nd night’s accomodation. It isn’t nice to ride in the dark, especially on busy, unlit roads. While my goggles obscured the road, it protected me from the roadkill bugs. Upon arrival, a torrential downpour of rain started, and we rushed to take our gear inside. Very lucky we didn’t have to ride in it.

Tonight’s accommodation is luxurious. I grab the long straw and I get a whole private family suite to myself. I even have a private outdoor shower decorated with pebbles and plants, but the ambient temperature was a bit too cold to enjoy at night.

The 3rd night was Đồng Văn, while not the biggest town of the trip, we were in a central location so could easily explore the local nightlife. As expected, this was non-existent, but we did share a beer or 2 as a group at the main square. On our return to our hotel, Hamish, Tim and I found some youths who were having a party at the restaurant across the road from our hotel. The tour guides and oldies Russ and Brian went back to the hotel, but we stayed. They were happy to have some foreigners join them. They were all basketball teachers, in their late teens to early 20s, on tour to teach basketball in rural areas.

The penultimate evening was spent at Bao Lac. A small quaint town, with not much to do at all. We opted for dinner at the hotel we stayed at.

Final night of the trip was at Ba Be Lake. We arrive early so that we could go for a boat ride on the lake and go for a swim. Afterwards, we had dinner at our homestay, over some beer and from what I can remember, expensive whiskey. Continuing on from that, we went and joined the homestay owner’s family in their sitting area, and continued to drink with them, while watching a big football match between Malaysia and Vietnam.

The ride home was boring, until we got to Hanoi and hit the traffic. I know for many people, this would be stressful, but it was incredible fun weaving and zipping through traffic on our motorcycles, in an attempt to cut down our time in traffice.

I will hope to upload an edited video from my GoPro footage very soon. For now, this is a video produced by the tour company itself.